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The OMG! Gardening Awards 2010

Could you be a winner?

Last year I launched The OMG! Gardening Awards as a leftfield, irreverent and proudly irrelevant alternative to the straight-laced gong show that is The Garden Media Guild Awards. Well, as you can no doubt see, I’ve decided to inject fresh blood into the withered corpse of the OMG! Gardening Awards and have resurrected it from its coffin for another year.

Here’s the background. On Wednesday 1 December, the great and the good of the gardening world, along with others looking for a good time, will gather for the 250th Garden Media Guild (GMG) Awards at The Brewery in East London. After gorging on a three course meal washed down with copious amounts of wine, the 500 or so folk will wait with baited breath to see whether they have a bagged one of the coveted awards, which are available in 21 categories.

I must make it clear at this point that I am a GMG committee member and have absolutely nothing against the GMG Awards – although I’m as bitter as hell about having never won anything. Don’t worry, I’m sure I’ll get over it one day. But, I felt the convention, formality and the predictability of this institution needed a good kick up its backside and inaugurated the OMG! Gardening Awards (here are the 2009 results). My inspiration? The Smash Hits Poll Winners Party of yesteryear and the BRAT awards, launched by the NME music paper as a lighter hearted alternative to the corporate stuffiness that is the BRIT awards.

So, you won’t find any awards for Best Magazine, Best TV Show or Practical Book of the Year here, but you can vote in 10 really important categories, such as Worst Dressed Gardener, Tweet of the Year and Top of the Mops award for best haircut.

The awards are open to all, wherever you are in the world and are completely democratic, so please cast your votes below without fear of intimidation. The rules? Well there aren’t any, you can vote for whoever you like. Oh, I thought I should mention that after some funny business last year, I’ve employed a crack security team to ensure that James Alexander Sinclair can’t submit multiple votes using cunning pseudonyms.

The deadline for voting is 30 November. A team of statisticians have been commissioned to help me crunch votes that night and the UN have promised to send an election inspector to my house to make sure that everything is above aboard. That’s it. And remember, your votes really do count!

OMG! Awards 2010 – The categories

1 Most snoggable male
2 Most fanciable female
3 Best dressed gardener
4 Worst dressed gardener
5 Tweet of the year
6 Where are they now? (the blogger, gardener, writer etc who seems to have vanished off the face of the earth)
7 Comeback of the year
8 Top of the mops award (best haircut)
9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself)
10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it)

*OMG! = Oh my God! Come on granddad, get with it.

104 comments to The OMG! Gardening Awards 2010

  • Great – some of us just cant afford the GMG awards so I’m glad you have brought this back

  • 1 Mark Diacono (its in my contract to say that)
    2 Dawn Issac
    3 Toby Buckland (though it should be me)
    4 Joe Swift
    5 Mathew Wilson for his grumpy pic
    6 Me have not blogged for ages
    7 Matt Biggs
    8 Rob Stacewicz it is lovely hair
    9 Matthew Appleby
    10 Anne Wareham in a lovely way and I love it

  • Trouble is Michelle is so spot on here it is hard to disagree! so, straining a bit for originality and sometimes just going with the obvious truth, here are mine
    1 Most snoggable male: if not Mark, Monty (controversial I know)
    2 Most fanciable female: Lia
    3 Best dressed gardener: Michelle
    4 Worst dressed gardener: Toby Buckland
    5 Tweet of the year: one of Dawn’s for sure
    6 Where are they now? (the blogger, gardener, writer etc who seems to have vanished off the face of the earth) Karen of An Artist’s Garden who hasn’t disappeared but isn’t blogging half often enough for me
    7 Comeback of the year: no idea, not sufficiently in touch to notice
    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut): has to be Rob Stacewicz
    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself): yep, has to be MA
    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it): and again, who else could it be but Anne and the world would be poorer without it!

  • 1.Couldnt possibly comment I am respectable married woman.
    2. Ditto
    3. Debs Goodenough
    4. Lady GaGa, you cant double dig looking like that.
    5. Matthew Wilson for his grumpy pic. (as above)
    6 Mrs. Loudon
    7.Alan Titchmarsh for his new show ‘Alans Garden Secrets’
    8.The lovely Rachel de Thame
    9. Any of the characters ‘In the Night Garden’
    10. me, and michelle, after these comments

  • Ok here are mine:
    1.Most snoggable male – Cleve West
    2. Most fanciable female: Michelle Wheeler (girly but showing the boys how its done)
    3. Best dressed gardener: James Alexander-Sinclair (for wearing a suit when we were all in wet weather gear at Malvern)
    4. Worst dressed gardener: Monty Don (fed up with those blue cords)
    5. Tweet of the year: Arabella Sock
    6. Emma (missed the Emmsworth Village Show this year)
    7. will ponder further
    8. Top of the mops: Michelle Wheeler (for showing us practial females with short hair that we should be more girly!)
    9. Get over yourself – Matthew Appleby
    10. Me and my big mouth – Pippa Greenwood (for her attack on garden bloggers

  • Kate B(ee)

    1 James A-S, on behalf of my mum
    2 Rachel de Thame
    3 Matthew Wilson
    4 Bob Flowerdew
    5 …
    6 Jane Moore
    7 Diarmuid Gavin for sheer effort!
    8 Bob Flowerdew
    9 Matthew Appleby
    10 Anne Wareham

  • Oh I agree with Ursula on number 7
    Alan titchmarsh for his wonderful new series which I found quite inspiring

  • 1 Most snoggable male – Joseph Swift – (I have relied on Mrs.S for this gem- she says she has “experience”)

    2 Most fanciable female – Not wanting to be seen to jumping on the Anne Widdecombe bandwagon (yes, she has got a garden) I will plump for Christine (beauty comes from within) Walkden. P.S. I’m taking medication for this

    3 Best dressed gardener – The female contingent of the Highgrove H’adventure

    4 Worst dressed gardener – see 2

    5 Tweet of the year – Martyn Cox for the OMG 2010 awards (on the grounds that tweets are ephemeral & it was the last one I read)

    6 Where are they now? (the blogger, gardener, writer etc who seems to have vanished off the face of the earth)Difficult – trying to find something which no longer exists – InCapability Brown (of Kirkcaldy)

    7 Comeback of the year – Heucheras (unfortunately)

    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut)Tom Stuart-Smith

    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself) Monty of Don – sorry Mr.Cord please don’t take it seriously(hold on, isn’t that your problem)

    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it)- Diarmuid Gavin and NOT Anne Wareham

  • Time for the Americans to step it up here!
    1. Dan Hinkley
    2. Michele Owens
    3. I’m drawing a blank…
    4. ME.
    Hmm… the rest of these are hard. I’ll have to think this over and come back to it.

  • OMG! Forgot to sign up for membership of GMG and had to pay FULL PRICE for awards lunch.
    Still stuttering with outrage, but here are my nominations.

    1 James Wong
    2 Dawn Isaacs
    3 Arabella Sock (especially the hattie-wats)
    4 Me
    5 Martyn Cox. (Shamelessly copied Simon S.)
    6 Emma (but she was having a baby, so she’s allowed. Come back soon, Emma!)
    7 Alan Titchmarsh
    8 James Wong
    9 Monty Don (more shameless plagiarism – apologies, Simon S)
    10 Certainly not Anne Wareham! Pippa Greenwood.

  • OK time for my own nominations…
    1 Chris Collins. Well, it would be a laugh
    2 Hayley Monkton at the RHS
    3 Alan Gray at East Ruston Old Vicarage. The only gardener to weed in head to toe Vivienne Westwood.
    4 Bob Flowerdew (possibly the lifetime achievement award winner in this category)
    5 Toby Buckland for THAT tweet
    6 Emma T
    7 Chelsea Flower Show – so much better than last years.
    8 Gavin McEwan at Horticulture Week. A flouncy Matt Smith (new Dr Who) barnet.
    9 The person I’d like to put is too litigious, so I’ll remain silent
    10 Anne Wareham, but in a good way

  • 1 Most snoggable male – Joseph Tychonievich
    2 Most fanciable female – Rebecca Sweet (Her last name says it all! Very sweeeeet!)
    3 Best dressed gardener – Louise Hartwig
    4 Worst dressed gardener – Joseph Tychonievich
    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut)- Christina Salwitz
    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it) – Colleen Vanderlinden

    *And for the other categories, I’ll take the Fifth Amendment!

  • 1. Most snoggable male has still got to be Cleve West but if he keeps cutting his hair short he might lose the title next year.
    2. The lovely Lia Leendertz
    3. Best dressed gardener Laetitia Maklouf wafting around her garden in some floaty feminine frills
    4. Worst dressed – Toby Buckland for the dog tag necklace and slightly too many buttons open on the shirts
    5. Tweet of the year – Simian Suter for the ‘who wants my cock’ twitter conversation NB He may not have used that exact phrase
    6. Emma – send the baby to pre-school and come back and play
    7. Comeback of the year – this has to be Matthew Appleby who after insulting 50 of the world most boring bloggers came back and did it again! Ha ha ha! You’ve got to hand it to him.
    8. Top of the mops must be pool man himself, Roland Paterson. Surely someone must commission a Grand Designs style TV series where Roland as pool man comes on and helps people install jacuzzi’s, pools and saunas, constantly turning to the viewer and angsting whether it will all be finished in time! I’d watch for sure its got to be better than Eddie Stobart.
    9. Get over yourself Lord Monty of Don did you hear the joke about the corduroy pillow? No? I’m amazed – it made headlines.
    10.Anne doesn’t put her foot in it so much as her body and soul! Therefore I’m abstaining on this award until I can think of a candidate

  • laura

    4. Joseph Tychonievich…the best!

  • Zoë

    1 Most snoggable male – Cleve West
    2 Most fanciable female – Anne Wareham – she’s just sooooooo stern *quivers*
    3 Best dressed gardener – James Alexander Sinclair
    4 Worst dressed gardener – Toby Buckland (he needs to sack his stylist)
    5 Tweet of the year – probably something by JAS – but I cant remember yesterday, let alone a whole year!
    6 Where are they now? – Emma T (well I know where she is, but miss seeing her around the place)
    7 Comeback of the year – Dahlias, and a good thing too!
    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut)Joe Swift *smirk* I love wide partings!
    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself)Matthew Appleby *fights boredom typing name*
    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it)

  • I now have the nominations from the SW London Jury….

    1 Always always always adorable Dan Pearson.
    2. Since meeting her in real life it has to be the delightful Lia
    3. Most tricky category this but I thought Anne Marie Powell looked rather appropriate at Highgrove!
    4. Oh come on, it has to be Sarah ‘ooh aren’t I just a bit of a toff’ Raven
    5. Dear Arabella ‘cos she makes me laugh sometimes although Rob Stacewicz & Simon Suter run a close second
    6. I have forgotten as they have been gone so long.
    7. No doubt, Patient Gardener as she has recently come back as an edibles gardener
    8. As of last Friday I think mine takes a lot of beating but I will go for Carol Klein
    9. Just who is this Mathew Appleby anyway?
    10. Not Anne, she jumps in with both feet but deliberately but I can’t think of anyone else just now…..

  • Roland Paterson

    1 Most snoggable male Mr T
    2 Most fanciable female I’m married to her. Well, she doesn’t garden, but is married to me, and I do. (Is that a cop out?)
    3 Best dressed gardener Toby Buckland
    4 Worst dressed gardener Toby Buckland
    5 Tweet of the year Arabella Sock (too many to list)
    6 Where are they now? (the blogger, gardener, writer etc who seems to have vanished off the face of the earth) Diarmuid Gavin
    7 Comeback of the year Joe Swift (renewed fan base and gathering momentum)
    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut) Do I need to answer that?
    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself) Monty Don grrrrr Crossed conversations, my arse!
    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it) The Monkey? (Anne knows roughly where I live, so I wouldn’t dare.)

  • 1. James (because I’m a sucker for a posh bloke who weeds with a sword…)
    2. Michelle (although now I’ve realised we’ve nominated each other and this is becoming downright sapphic)
    3. Anne Marie for her floaty fabulousness
    4. Alan Titchmarsh for a shirt so shiny you needed shades
    5. One of the many by Mark Diacono or Lia – especially those in which they are downright insulting to each other
    6. Mr McGregor – one minute he’s trying to catch Peter Rabbit, then nothing for the next 100 years
    7. Martyn – for the wonderful OMGs after, let’s face it, disappearing from the blogging world for weeks at a time
    8. Am going to plump for Helen – for the hatwear atop the mop
    9. Matthew “I broke that story, oh and that one, and that one too” Appleby
    10. MA again – is there a segment of humanity he hasn’t insulted with aplomb this year?

  • Kate B(ee)

    Can I change my vote?

  • [...] “LoL. Looks like you’re an early contender for one of the OMG! Awards”, says Martyn Cox, in txtspk. The awards are MC’s alternative Garden Media Guild awards, [...]

  • OMG! Awards 2010 – The categories

    1 Most snoggable male smouldering Matthew Wilson
    2 Most fanciable female smokin’ Ann Marie Powell

    3 Best dressed gardener Laetitia Maklouf – loving the dresses and wellies combos
    4 Worst dressed gardener male – Toby Buckland for looking like a lost Walton; female – Sarah Raven for terrible skirts

    5 Tweet of the year Arabella Sock closely followed by Matthew Wilson’s mud picture
    6 Where are they now? (the blogger, gardener, writer etc who seems to have vanished off the face of the earth) Ann Marie Powell but only cos she doesn’t blog enough!
    7 Comeback of the year Alan Titchmarsh
    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut) Carol Klein
    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself) not sure who Matthew Appleby is, sorry
    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it) Anne Wareham – suspect she’d be very annoyed if she didn’t win this one!

  • 1 Joseph of Greensparrow Gardens
    2 Fern of Life on the balcony
    3 Mike of The Urban Organic Gardener
    4 myself? lol
    5 IDK
    6 The 6×8 Garden
    7 Comeback of the year
    8 Adriana of Anarchy in the Garden
    9 Mr Brown THumb lol
    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it)

  • 1 Most snoggable male – Matthew Wilson (I never did thank him properly for that talk)

    2 Most fanciable female – too many to mention, Lia, Laetitia, Ann-Marie. I’ll settle for MichTWheeler

    3 Best dressed gardener – Ms B, for a Lazy Trollop, she does dress incredibly stylish, like

    4 Worst dressed gardener – Toby Buckland

    5 Tweet of the year – Toby Buckland (if it was really him?) or Arabella for making me laugh out loud so many times.

    6 Where are they now? (the blogger, gardener, writer etc who seems to have vanished off the face of the earth) – Dan Pearson (What has Ms B done with him? Either that or Mark D had something to do with his disappearance…)

    7 Comeback of the year – The Double Decker

    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut) – Well, my hair is more lustrous and luxuriant than Roland’s and James Wong’s put together. Vote for me and a lock will be popped in the post for you for your delectation and/or love potions and/or voodoo dolls.

    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself) – which two am I thinking of here?

    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it) – the deliciously inimitable Helen Reeley, who didn’t realise who Cleve West was on the coach out of Highgrove. Fortunately we kept it secret to save her embarassment…till now!

  • mark stallard

    2. Michelle Wheeler – Make’s any garden infinitely more beautiful

  • Feel woefully ill-equipped to vote since rarely meet anyone from the ‘gardening world’ actually in the flesh (usually hunched over a computer in a dark room), but here goes…

    1 Most snoggable male
    Fergus Garrett at Great Dixter
    2 Most fanciable female
    Laetitia Maklouf for working that vintage tea dress/wellies combo so well
    3 Best dressed gardener
    See 2
    4 Worst dressed gardener
    Christine Walkden, with neatness points for that sharp side parting
    5 Tweet of the year
    I liked the one from Mark Diacano about going for a walk and seeing a kingfisher, sweet
    6 Where are they now? (the blogger, gardener, writer etc who seems to have vanished off the face of the earth)
    Emma T/Sarah Raven (from the telly, did she scare everyone away after that Sissinghurst programme?)
    7 Comeback of the year
    Toby Buckland – from cable channel hinterland to BBC flagship show and a fitted waxed jacket
    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut)
    Can I change this to worst haircut and nominate Bob Flowerdew? And if he wins can we cut his plait off?
    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself)
    Matthew Appleby
    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it)
    Anne Wareham, and long may she continue

  • 1. Matthew Wilson – something ‘of the night’ about this one
    2. Anne Wareham – I’ve never met her, but like her tweets, so she must be nice
    3. Dowager Duchess of Devonshire – how glam can you get? Note to self: must serve cuppa in best bone china
    4. Sarah Raven – jumble sale, anyone?
    5. Three Men Went To Mow – well, I like the photos, anyway
    6. Dan Pearson – no, he’s not my husband
    7. Bees – maybe (see 10)
    8. Tom Stuart-Smith – with co-ordinating eyebrows
    9. Matthew Appleby – duh
    10. RHS – do they actually know about bees? First of all its ‘bee population in decline’, then ‘actually, research says numbers are fine’, then a rash of bee-friendly gardens at RHS shows leaves them going ecstatic and how we must encourage bees (mainly because all the bees are now at RHS shows)……

  • 1. Tom Sykes (ladies google him – but not the motorbike rider) or Mark Diacono? I’ve been trying to imagine it for hours. Happily.
    2. All are gorgeous – clearly I find it hard to make decisions
    3. Andrew Wilson for sporting that white leather jacket whilst judging at Chelsea 2010
    4.Toby Buckland for his Penelope Pitstop jackets
    5. Toby Buckland on Carol Klein
    6. Charlie Dymott
    7. Alan Titchmarsh for stealthily sneaking GroundForce back, in guise of programmes about Britain’s beautiful gardens
    8. Diarmuid Gavin
    9 Diarmuid Gavin
    10. I couldn’t possiblyname and shame but enjoyed observing some rather frosty contre-temps over misunderstood tweets over the last few months

  • ps
    7 – I’m not saying that’s good; just that it was an amazingly sneaky thing to do
    9 – add Mony Don to that just for good measure….

  • pps
    I need to add to the groupette JAS because he is practically perfect in very way. Am I allowed 3 men?

  • ppps I meant in category1 OBVIOUSLY. Will stop now

  • Jo: Andrew Wilson didn’t have his white leathers on by time he got to judge me at Chelsea. Shame….

  • 1. Difficult one, but after a couple of bottles of wine I suppose I could cope with James A Sinclair. No tongues tho.
    2. Anne Wareham comes a close second, but first place is between Lia, Laetitia…and of course Michelle!
    3. Ah, the always elegant Laetitia :)
    4. Hmmm….Joe Swift.
    5. Too many to mention…perhaps part of the conversation involving revolving plastic dogs at Chelsea. (But i’m just biased)
    6. The once ubiquitous Diarmuid Gavin (okay I know he still pops up from time to time)
    7. Doctor Who
    8. the one and only Matthew Wilson
    9. Can’t say right at this time :)
    10. Who else but Anne Wareham! Or…sometimes I do a good job of it :)

  • If anyone is stuck on number 8, I am accepting nominations for my sharply sculpted Walthamstow fin.

  • A nominated representative from the quail covey

    The confederation of quail(COQ)have requested that a submission be made on their behalf. Views expressed below are theirs not mine.

    1 Most snoggable male – The Womble (that’ll confuse a few of you)
    2 Most fanciable female – ahead by miles – Gillian Elizabeth
    3 Best dressed gardener – Gillian Elizabeth
    4 Worst dressed gardener – all of the others
    5 Tweet of the year – the one from Gillian Elizabeth when she reads this.
    6 Where are they now? (the blogger, gardener, writer etc who seems to have vanished off the face of the earth)- Ted the gardener (you remember him, he used to cut the grass in the Yellow pages advert)
    7 Comeback of the year – is that a rhetorical question ?
    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut) – Martyn Cox (whoever he is)
    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself) – me
    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it)me

    p.s. the covey consists of 18 quail all of which are in accord, consequently each answer above should represent 18 votes.

  • Hmmm, most of these seem to involve actually seeing people. Tough call if you live at the bottom of a well. However…

    1 Most snoggable male – Bryn…former head gardener at Waterperry – decidedly tasty, a bit like Anthony Kiedis without the heroin
    2 Most fanciable female – Cinead McTernan rocking Yummy Mummy at Hampton Ct
    3 Best dressed gardener – Alan Gray, pink shirt silver (?) suit combo at Chelsea
    4 Worst dressed gardener – where to begin?
    7 Martyn – see Dawn’s comment above, and it would be nice to win something, no? Failing that I’ll go with bees.
    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself) – will go with massed opinion – MA

    Off to ponder the merits of various haircuts…

    • Although gardeners have a reputation for being badly dressed, I was recently at a social club and it was like stepping back into the 1970s. The crowd were terribly dressed. There was even a pub rock band belting out Mud numbers and some of the drinkers took to dancing with their thumbs in their front pockets doing that bizarre side to side dancing. Oh, and then there was a raffle where people could win torches and other strange items that you wouldn’t particularly want to win.

  • From the Irish Jury…

    1 Most snoggable male – Dan Pearson (minus facial hair though!)
    2 Most fanciable female – Anne Marie Powell cos she seems the most fun from woman’s perspective!
    3 Best dressed gardener – JAS – so dapper
    4 Worst dressed gardener – sorry Toby – the shirts
    5 Tweet of the year – Arabella Sock and the unfollow saga
    6 Where are they now – The lovely Diarmuid Gavin
    7 Comeback of the year- Alan T
    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut) – Carol Klein
    9 Get over yourself – Matt Appleby
    10 Me and big mouth – in a loveable way, Anne Wareham

  • 1 Most snoggable male: Mark Diacono and Matthew Wilson silly!
    2 Most fanciable female: Lazy Trollop, Arabella Sock and Helen Reeley…I’ve met them and they are properly lush…
    3 Best dressed gardener Toby Buckland, because he took off his Belstaff (thank you Toby) and Monty Don because I LOVE corduroy
    4 Worst dressed gardener Alan Tichmarsh and if you dont know why then I can’t help you
    5 Tweet of the year Absolutely Arabella with unfollowgate and Monkey who makes me laugh (although I’m sure he doesn’t mean to)
    6 Where are they now? (the blogger, gardener, writer etc who seems to have vanished off the face of the earth) Apparently Emma T used to blog/tweet? – T’was before my bloggy/tweety time but I’d love it if she started again
    7 Comeback of the year JAS for finding his way out of the Westfield (well done James)
    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut) Lia (silkiness) Rob (bounciness), Matthew (badgeriness)
    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself) dunno
    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it) Totally, and quite rightly, the wonderfully outspoken Anne

  • I know I should settle with just being honored that I was nominated for the “Get Over Yourself” award, but I’m really hoping I win that it comes with a gift certificate for my favorite fast food joint.

  • TheGrimmGardener

    1 Most snoggable male: hard to chose from the array of chaps but if one has to – Matthew Wilson followed by Mark D and obviously Monty D
    2 Most fanciable female: I couldn’t possibly say …..though Ann Marie and Rachel DT must be on someones list, surely?!
    3 Best dressed gardener: The Viv Westwood togged chap gets my vote though I have to take his labels on trust never having seen him.
    4 Worst dressed gardener: so many to chose from…
    5 Tweet of the year: has to be Toby B on Carol K
    6 Where are they now? (the blogger, gardener, writer etc who seems to have vanished off the face of the earth) don’t keep up enough to notice the pauses.
    7 Comeback of the year: AT probably, but then I have to say did he ever really go away?
    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut): Cleve West
    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself): …………..
    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it): ……………

    I must say if it were not a public vote the replies might be somewhat more interesting ;)

  • 1 Most snoggable male – Housewives favourite Dan Pearson
    2 Most fanciable female – The beautiful and delightful Michelle Wheeler
    3 Best dressed gardener – Martyn Cox (Orange Nordic Jumpers are still a winner)
    4 Worst dressed gardener – Easily Toby Buckland for those god-awful boots!
    5 Tweet of the year – Any relating to rotating dogs at Chelsea by @GardenHero or being in a forest by @bulchey
    6 Where are they now? (the blogger, gardener, writer etc who seems to have vanished off the face of the earth) – Where’s Christine gone?
    7 Comeback of the year – Gardeners World
    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut) – Joe Swift?
    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself) – I think this award has already been won!
    10 Me and my big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it) – No idea.

  • 1 snoggable male – Mark D is rather lovely, but dont tell him I said so
    2 snoggable female – Laetitia Maklouf of course! Are you all BLIND?! (apart from the ones that voted for me)
    3 Best dressed – Arabella Sock – always setting the seasonal trends (but can I also give an honourable mention to Dawn Isaac in THAT dress at Highgrove. Sauce.)
    4 worst dressed – Toby Buckland has been subject to some bizarre styling decisions this series. It has to be him. But I did like the jerkin.
    5 best tweet – MarkDoc’s fruit-based Chandler tweets! Making me laugh just thinking about them: ‘she gave me a lime I could peel in my hip pocket’ etc… I’m sure we were promised a blog post…
    6 where are they now? – I am delighted you have made a category exclusively designed so that we can demand the return of Emma T. Emma T! Emma T!
    7 Comeback of the year – The Garden Monkey. I thought we had lost him/her for a while back there, but thank goodness no.
    8 Top of the mops – was going to be Rob S until I saw the thing about the lock of hair. Ew…Oh go on then. Rob S. But you can keep it.
    9 Get over yourself – can’t think of anyone.
    10 Me and big mouth – again am struggling. Think Anne has calmed down a bit. We need a new enfant terrible to come in and shake us all up.

  • 1 Most snoggable male: Id like to vote for myself, repugnant as I maybe, just to give myself a chance of winning….but in all conscience I have to go for Cleve
    2 Most fanciable female: tricky one this…magnificent turn out ladies, if you don’t mind my saying so *curries favour*. So many to bring a twinkle to the eye. But the criteria for judgment are so numerous and so complicated, and must be swayed at least in part by flattery (I am o the weaker sex afte all) and by the upcoming GMAs. Jo T, who knows, it might have been you but you are not at the GMAs and also put Matthew W in your nomination, thereby denying me a half point and affording it to one of my OMG rivals….Lia, who knows, it might have been you, but you’ve decided to desert the finest of GMA tables..neither of you will ever know for sure and must live the remainder of your days in wondering and turmoil. So in the interest of a bit of footsee under the GMAs table my vote goes to the equally delicious Laetitia M, Dawn I and Michelle W
    3 Best dressed gardener: Laetitia of course…followed not so closely by Joe swift (http://www.otterfarm.co.uk/gallery/images/malvern-12.jpg)
    4 Worst dressed gardener: So many to choose from….but for the coat and boots…sorry Toby
    5 Tweet of the year: EQuall between Tobys, and anyone contributing to the #traingrub, #trainsub afternoon which had be howling
    6 Where are they now? (the blogger, gardener, writer etc who seems to have vanished off the face of the earth) Come on Emma T, back to it lass
    7 Comeback of the year: *serious moment* Toby B for taking the unfair horsehit thrown at him during the GW changes and rising above
    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut) Martyn Cox for almost begging for a vote
    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself) If Martyn had named Diarmuid I would’ve put the same as him but as he didn’t I won’t either
    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it) Arise Lady Anne, Queen of all you survey

  • And here are the votes from the Dutch jury:

    1. Most snoggable male: Hugh Jackman What? He’s into gardening, honest, I read it on the internet so it must be true. Proof here: http://tinyurl.com/mwuw4m

    2. Most fanciable female: me and frightfully snoggable too, see irrefutable evidence of my utter snog appeal here http://tinyurl.com/3xk24xg Please note how Swifty is chomping at the bit to get his snog in. Runner up : Lia Leendertz(she’s 25% Dutch don’t ya know & gorgeous)

    3. – best dressed female gardener: me, runner up Laetitia Maklouf
    – best dressed male gardener: the lord of cord, runner up JAS sans tweed

    4. worst dressed female gardener: Sarah Raven, runner up Alyce Fowler
    – worst dressed male gardener: JAS avec tweed, runner up: the lord of cord sans cord

    5. Tweet of the year: the Sock’s unfollow thingy- priceless!

    6. Where are they now? Emma T, please come back!!!!

    7. Comeback of the year: huh? Who? wha?

    8. – top of the mops female: me, runner up Mich Wheeler for that extra swishy hair
    – top of the mops male: Roland Paterson (50% Dutch so there)runner up: Rob Stacewics with his elfin locks
    – worst hairdo eva: Sarah Raven. Some people have a bad hair day, she seems to have a bad hair life, poor thing.

    9. Get over yourself: ehhhh, oh, hang on, NOT me coz I’m frightfully modest, honest! But wasn’t there a chap called Applepie or somefink?

    10. Me and my big mouth: me, runner up the lovely Anne Wareham

    And this concludes the utterly unbiased votes from the Dutch jury. Over to you Martyn!

  • Due to the above,trying to please everyone comment and the fact that there is a threat of footsie (barfs up ) I am changing my vote.As a professional woman gardener I ain’t falling for that charm…My vote for most snoggable male goes to James A Sinclair.( Champagne is on me James)xxxx

  • Allotment hat

    1 Most snoggable male – Matthew Wilson or James Wong
    2 Most fanciable female – Alys Fowler – my hubby doesn’t ask “what else is on?” when Alys is on – so i guess that makes her fanciable.
    3 Best dressed gardener – Matthew Wilson
    4 Worst dressed gardener – Bob Flowerdew
    5 Tweet of the year – haven’t been on long enough
    6 Where are they now? (the blogger, gardener, writer etc who seems to have vanished off the face of the earth) Charlie Dimmock – only remembered her, saw a kids gardening trug with her name on it on ebay – must be ancient.
    7 Comeback of the year –
    8 Top of the mops award (best haircut)- James Wong
    9 Get over yourself (person with an overinflated opinion of him or herself) – monty don
    10 Me and big mouth (a person in the gardening world who can’t help putting their foot in it) – i have a garden and i usually insult someone, so me!!!

  • Charles Hawes

    1. Most snoggable Female: Wel, Anne wareham of course Anne- Marie Powell could get lucky if she plays her cards right
    2. Most snoggable Male. Yuk.
    3. Best Dressed: Anne Wareham . Really. Just have a good look next time you see her. Lovely!
    4. Worst Dressed: Toby Buckland. SO boring
    5. Tweet of the Year. Has to be Anne wareham. So so many to choose from
    6. Where are they now. I dunno. Where are they?
    7. Comeback of the Year. Hasn’t come back yet
    8. Best haircut. Joe Swift HA HA HA
    9. Get over yourself. Very close competition between Dan Pearson and Monty Don but Dan gets it by a whisker.
    10. Me and my big mouth. Sorry Anne but Matt Appleby wins it by a mile!

    Charles Hawes

  • 1 Most snoggable male – Cleve West (but I’m with Arabella – if his haircut gets any shorter I’ll be voting for someone else next year)
    2 Most fanciable female – R says I should vote for Rachel de Thame again, though he wavered a bit when shown pictures of Laetitia Maklouf
    3 Best dressed gardener – James Alexander-Sinclair
    4 Worst dressed gardener – still Bob Flowerdew, but Alan Titchmarsh’s shiny-shirt-with-jeans look made him a close second this year
    5 Tweet of the year – nooooo, I don’t have time to keep up with all the blogs I read, when am I supposed to find time to read tweets as well?!
    6 Where are they now? – Emma T – please come back Emma, we miss you!
    7 Comeback of the year – Alan Titchmarsh for his Garden Secrets
    8 Top of the mops award – Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen – sorry, I can’t help myself :-[
    9 Get over yourself – Matthew Appleby
    10 Me and big mouth – Anne Wareham

  • And this year’s winners are….
    1 I have it on good authority that it’s Cleve.
    2 Too many to choose from. Suggest we line up all the candidates in the pub after the GMG Awards for a definitive test! No? OK, fair enough, I’ll go with dishy Laetitia.
    3 Are there any? JA-S just scrapes it.
    4 Still Bob Flowerdew.
    5 An award for not being able to write properly? Defo nt vting 4 ths 1.
    6 Yes, where is Emma T? Answers on a tweet…
    7 Mr T and his Secrets – altho they’re not really secrets. It’s the first time this year I’ve tuned into a TV gardening programme and watched it all the way through, without switching off in disgust.
    8 Surely it has to be Greg Loades for hacking off his 70s Leo Sayer mop and joining the 21st century hairstyle brigade.
    9 Sorry Matthew A, but it’s you. Well, you do want to win an Award
    10 I’d have to say Anne W, and not just because everyone else does. But we need another runner, so I’ll put my money collectively on the RHS.

  • Scott

    4. Joseph Tychonievich – badly dressed, but
    8. Joseph Tychonievich – great hair

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